Words of Wisdom

Found this very interesting...and uplifting!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/23711234/What-Matters-Now

Spirit of Christmas

Christmas has come and gone this year. I don’t know why, but for some reason, I had a hard time getting into the spirit, which is very unusual for me. Maybe it is the stress of work combined with the gazillion of hours on the road driving to hockey. I don’t know. But then I remembered something very important: Christmas memories are not about the cookies that didn’t get baked or the presents that didn’t get bought.

Here are some of my memories, for good or bad:

The Christmas that…

Santa showed up at a party of Mom and Dad’s – and no one knew, to this day, who it was
Cousin Pete threw up in church, in the front pew (one too many deviled eggs)
There was a blizzard
There was no snow
Zero (the family dog) ate all the rising caramel rolls
My sister arm wrestled my brother into the Christmas tree
We did a scavenger hunt and the prize was a family trip to Jamaica
I was on crutches (x2)
Was Dad’s last
I was proposed to
Everyone was pregnant
Half the family had the flu
Was in the new house and the kids all secretly threw candy down the clothes shoot
Mom was recovering in a Jewish nursing home and we went over there and watched a movie and ate Christmas cookies (They’re watching ‘The Elf” in there!)
My daughter and I were in our own house and happy

Surviving H1N1

It was a busy weekend. Lots of sports and lots of errands to try and fit in. Woke up with a sore throat. Cough, cough. Hmm, something is going on. Came home, fell asleep in the chair. Not unheard of, but unusual in that I was trying to watch a big game. Man, I am freezing. In fact, I have been freezing for a few days. More blankets and off to bed. At 9 pm. Woke up with a horrible headache and a fever of 102. Run to the bathroom. This is not good.

Load up on Imodium, Tylenol and Gatorade. Sleep, sleep, and more sleep. Had a bit of a fright on one of my runs to the bathroom – apparently the Gatorade did not absorb at all and came out the same color. Certain things just should not be blue. EWWW!

Of course I am the one to get H1N1. I had no doubt that I would. Just the way my life rolls. I have to say it ranks in my top 3 illnesses. The other two being food poisoning (Norwalk Virus) and Ehrlichiosis (tick disease). After a week of barricading myself in my room, I finally ventured out. Man, people don’t want to even come near you when they hear you have “Swine Flu”. I get it, but I am pretty sure I am not contagious anymore. Maybe…

Are You Ready for Some Football/Hockey/Baseball/Curling?

At the age of ten, if asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would answer, "A color commentator for the NFL." Either I got a laugh or a "what???" Growing up, sports were prominent in our household. I have very early memories of on Sundays, being given a dollar and my brother who was closest in age to me, and I would be sent off to the neighborhood movie theater. Other Sundays, mom would take us to the drug store to pick out "quiet time" activities. No one wanted the youngest kids making noise during the football game. I learned quickly that if I wanted to sit in the family room, with all the fun, I had to 1. Behave and 2. Learn football. I became the master of listening to the commentators so I could repeat facts and sound like I knew what I was talking about. I learned that if I yelled out "holding" when there was a whistle, I was usually correct. But a funny thing happened. Pretty soon I knew the difference between a hold and encroachment. And I started to love the game. A couple of my brothers readily admit that I knew more than they did. Football was big, but so were other sports. I knew baseball, basketball (although, really only watched college ball), and hockey. It was like a holiday in our house when the high school hockey tournament or the Olympics were on.

We also played sports. My sister and I played varsity sports in high school. Growing up in the 70's and 80's, girl sports still were finding their way. But it was never once suggested that we couldn't do anything that we wanted. I really have to give props to my mom and dad for allowing us to grow up believing in ourselves. I remember one time, in grade school, coming home late. My mom asked where I had been. I shamefully said, at cheer leading tryouts. All my siblings burst out laughing. Then I quietly said that I had made the squad. My mom said that was great and that made the razzing stop. Ok, not totally, but still.

Today, my daughter plays hockey and volleyball. Hockey is huge in our state and the girl programs are the biggest in the country. I have to say, my pride in those facts is huge. Sports will always play a big part in my life. It is about confidence, spirit, pride, skill, and most of all - being able to go out and kick ass!

R.E.M

If you were hoping for a really cool post about a really cool band, you are mistaken. This about the REM that happens when we sleep. My nights are filled with little sleep, but many vivid dreams. My unsubstantiated opinion is that I only sleep in R.E.M. Here is a glimpse at a typical night:

10:00 pm: Watch the news headlines
10: 15 pm: Go the bathroom, put on jammies, crawl into bed
10:22 pm: Flip channels on TV between the news, Friends re-runs, Sportscenter, Conan O'Brian, Letterman.
11:oo pm: Start thinking it would be nice to fall asleep soon - turn off TV, lights. Turn on radio and alarm clock time projector
11:22pm: Somehow, always look at the time projected on the wall at exactly 11:22 - makes me happy as it is a important date
11:57 pm: Decide I am not going to fall asleep, turn light on and pick up book and read
12:38 am: Mine as well check Facebook...
12:56 am: Back to bed...drift off to sleep
1:26 am: Wake up with a start - think someone is standing over me. Whew, dreaming. Wait, where am I? Am I late for work???
3:13 am : You won't believe this dream I had...it was so weird...wait, I am still dreaming. I just had a dream within a dream. What, am I awake?
5:05 am: Wake up mid swing - punched out the pillow. Damn it.
6:38 am: beep, beeP, beEP, bEEP, BEEP! Turn off alarm - curse. Where am I? What day is it? Check the day of the week, shake out the cobwebs, get out of bed and head to the shower. Another day begins...

Catholic Guilt

Either you know what Catholic Guilt is or you don't. If you do, I am sorry (see!).

This week was a doozy. The most prevalent guilt I experience is the single mom guilt. Whenever I have to work late, have after work functions, or want to hang out with my friends...guilt. I know my teenage daughter is fine, but as an only child, I hate leaving her alone for a long time. She is very social and usually is with friends or cousins when I am out in the evening. She is having fun and most likely happy that mom is out and they have the house to themselves. But still, it gnaws at my conscience. Does it matter if I get home at 10:30 or midnight? Not really...Ugh!

This economy has spawned a new kind of survivor guilt when I still have a job and so many friends/family/co-workers have been laid off. And that guilt also includes the bad karma I must have sent into the world about co-workers I complained about who now do not have a job. Again, ugh!

And don't even get me started on when I miss a family event or church...I think my mom is at the root of that. The conversation usually goes something like this -
"Are you going to ____"
"Ah, no, I am not"
"Why"
"I am busy with work, we have a hockey game, I need to do laundry, have to go grocery shopping, get the recycling out, dye my hair..."
"Well, I used to do laundry every day for 8 people"
"That's great Mom, but I am not home during the day to get all that done"
"I did shopping on Monday, baking on Tuesday, ironing on Wednesday- which no one seems to do anymore..."
"Ok, Mom, I got to go. have fun!"

Ok, I better go to bed so I get get up in time for 7 am mass...

Accident waiting to happen...

Most people can say things like "I was in a car accident once" or "I had a cast once". To be perfectly honest, I don't think I could even name all my accidents - car, bone, stitches or otherwise.

Lets start when I was two. I was running around, bugging my older brother. My mom told me to leave him alone (according to family folklore) and I didn't- again I was TWO. He was laying on the floor, tripped me, and I went flying into the brick fireplace. Stitches. This was the first of many...

High school - I was on crutches two different times (once for 3 weeks), a broken wrist, a concussion...that's off the top of my head. The concussion - it was a downhill ski accident - plowed into by an out-of-control skier. Was in the hospital and the doctor was asking questions to assess my injury. Name,address...fine could answer. Age, that question threw me. I guess it changes each year. Then he asked "who was president during WWI?" Roosevelt? My mom then told the doctor that it was not the concussion that caused the wrong answer, but that "she is really bad at history". True, but jeez Mom...

The worst accident happened in college. I was on spring break in Mexico. Last night there, on the way back to the hotel. I was in a taxi with the guy I had met and hung out with all week. Suddenly I saw a car hurling through the air right at us. Next memory is waking up and thinking I had no legs. Severely cut my left leg (now referred to as my Bleg - Bad Leg), broke my nose, and broke my wrist. I spent a week in a Mexico hospital, had numerous surgeries. I came home on my 21st birthday on all sorts of Mexican drugs and in a wheelchair - which thankfully I only needed for about 1 week. Two of my friends stayed with (actually one friend, one cousin). It was quite the comedy of errors on the way home. Namely when they searched me, in casts made from paper and 2x4's. Yep, we looked like drug smugglers.

More recently, I had a really bad summer. It was a low point in my life- living with my daughter at my brother's. Transition time, I guess. Anyhow, I just got a new job (yeah!). First off, on my second day, I went to lunch with my department. Fell and broke my wrist. Then, about two weeks later,I got a fever. Then became, um lets call it altered. At one point, I was seeing evil fairies fly out of the wall paper. Tried my best to power through. Doctor thought I had hepatitis - definitely liver functions were being affected. Uck! Then that came back negative. I started feeling a little better, but not much. One night, I was having horrible pains. Finally asked my brother to bring me to the ER. Had emergency surgery on my infected gallbladder and was diagnosed with a tick borne disease.

My daughter has unfortunately inherited this trait of accident proneness. I don't know if it clumseyness or just bad luck. Whatever it is, it is just our lives.

My friends tell me I will be one of those crazy ladies in a scooter, with flags waving, a horn and a bell.

Nails

My entire life, I have been a nail bitter. Gross, I know. I tried everything to stop. Every Lent, I would give up bitting my nails, with varying degrees of success. Sometimes by Easter, I could actually use a bit of polish. By Easter Monday, somehow, they would be short again. So, a few years ago, I was going to a wedding. I had an little black sleeveless dress, a blackwrap, and a very unactractive purple cast (more on my accident proneness later). What is a girl to do? I needed something to draw attention away from my cast. Ah Ha! Fake nails...

Now, I had never, in my 30 something years, been into a nail salon. No mani/pedis for me, ever. I made my daughter tag along and set out. I walked in, said I wanted some fake nails put on. Who knew there were so many choices? Finally, after some confusion on my part, I settled on acyrlic nails, with a deep red color (had to match my funky purse). One hour later, I walked out a happy girl. Having never had nails before, I could barely function at the simplist tasks - getting keys out, puting on lipstick, lighting a smoke, and don't even get me started on going to the bathroom...

A year and a half later, I faithfully go to the salon every tree weeks to get my nails touched up, have a made friend in Ling, and discovered the beauty of a pedicure. Every women and man needs to experience the relaxing effects of the pedi - I even treat my teenage daughter to them (great bribe, by the way).

Reason 742 why I love living in a city, where we can walk to get our nails done (cheap rates too), grab a bite to eat, browse a used book store and say hi to friends.

Suebonics

As many people spend their days, I am in Cube World. I don't mind it, as I am social by nature. We spend much of the day talking to each other and listening to each other's conversations. I am pretty open and really do not care what my co-workers overhear. Can't say whether they like to hear it or not...Anyhow, my point in all of this is that conversations often turns to food - what everyone is making for dinner, etc...So today,I called my daughter to have her make some rice for tonight's dinner, "Chipotle" style burritoes. As I hung up, I hollered to my coworkers that "I know I misprounced it!!!" You see, I have my own way of speaking, that was dubbed years ago as "Suebonics." What I really said was cha-polt-te. My brain just does this on many words. September has no p...breakfast has no k...and today I was told that hearse (Michael Jackson inspired consversation) is not hearst. Side note on Michael Jackson - it was his funeral today and the best part was a high school class mate who works for one of the big cable news networks kept a running commentary on her facebook. Favorite comment of the day "what, no candle in the wind?"

Off to zest some limes...

Firsts

This is my first post for Curse the Alarm. I realize that this is really only exciting for me. Just like I realize that usually I am the only one that finds myself funny. I spend a lot of time with two of my friends that I have know since high school (very Minnesota). Why I am mentioning this is that the guy friend always says that in a group of 3, there is a smart one, a funny one, and the Ho. I like to think I am the smart one, wish I were the Ho, so that leaves the funny one.

I think my humor comes from being the youngest in a typical Irish family. Lots of kids, church at least once a week, and dinners that last two hours. If I wanted to be heard, first I had to be loud, then I had to keep their attention. Worked sometimes, other times I was dubbed "Princess Puberty."

Laughter has gotten me though many things in life, including the last years of dealing with Jackass (JA) - which is my ex husband. We were marrried young, had a lovely marriage, one child and then he became a cliche. Affair with his assistant, embezzeled money, went to jail. Really, a lot of laughs can be found in these situations. Such as the time my friends and family were helping me move and we kept looking in boxes for "missing" money. No such luck. Although a found a finner and a pack of cigs in his jacket pocket. Score!

So, I was driving home from a holiday weekend "Up North" and saw a very odd man on a motorcycle. He was wearing very short shorts and a helmet. That was ALL. He also had a heater hanging from his mouth and a drink in his hand, sporting a nice tan. I swear to you, I thought he was naked until I got next to him. Clearly he has his priorities straight...

It has been a long day and I really am not looking forward to that alarm clock tomorrow morning...